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Drill Instructor Wallace privately contemplates the evening ahead with Janine, whom he knows only as 'HotMomma327' on Yahoo Chat. He hopes she's everything he's been imagining. Keeping their romance secret has been easy thus far, as it was limited to sweaty one-handed sessions in his quarters with his imac. But now, as the hour of truth approaches, he wonders if she's worth risking a career in The United States Homo Brigade.

Talk about confused.